Spam Bot Love Song is a collection of poems.
Extract:
When You See it You'll Shit Bricks
Look,
left to right, track down to the bottom, and swing to the right.
bottom to top, left moves rightward, bottom to top.
both ways before crossing the road, in someone's eyes when you talk to them,
not into the eyes of an angry dog,
or a stranger at night,
for cyclists before opening the door,
And for fallen power-lines after a storm.
Left to right, up and down.
I spy a kitten, a bird on a pail,
Two pencils, a pizza, a fish and a snail.
Can you find the stormtrooper in the room of pandas?
Can you find the spider in the pile of coal?
Can you find the lowest prices on new and used cars?
Can you find the best legal advice, or someone to love, or someone who knows first aid, or somebody who really just gets me, or somebody who speaks your language, who can find the right legal solution, or Wally, or where in the world Carmen Sandiago is?
I spy a shell, a bell and a knight.
A marble, a truck, and a bird taking flight.
Left to right.
Up and down.
Uh-oh!
Safety Sam is visiting his friend Dave the Dangerous Dingo.
There are eight things in Dave's kitchen that are totally not safe.
Can you spot them all?
Left to right, up and down.
Sometimes it's difficult to tell the difference between things.
A mole and a melanoma.
A bad mood and a breakdown.
A hot date and a rapist.
Can you spot five differences between these two images?
Please click on potential hazards that could interrupt your driving. Give this test your full attention; one day your life may depend on this skill.
Uh oh!
James the Jihadi Jabaru has been talking with Safety Sam's fifteen friends.
He's been telling then that the end of aggressive Western Imperialism is only possible through violent resistance.
Can you find which of Sam's friends have been turned against him?
If you see something, say something.
Hairstyles, accents, clothing choices, stories that don't quite add up, all these can be clues.
Have you ever bought or rented a videotape that wasn't quite right?
Please report scams or illegal material by pressing the report button.
88 can mean Heil Hitler.
We suggest you check all characteristics that apply to your or your loved one's group, and print this page for future reference.
I'd like to pay by paypal, but will have a courier collect the car as I’m working on an oil rig.
The Tax Office will never ask you for your username and password.
Can you find the
Needle in the haystack?
Q in the Os?
Drunk driver on the highway?
Domestic abuser on the dating site?
Uh oh!
Safety Samantha's seven best boy buddies have been talking with Carl the Coercive Cockatoo. He recommends they get her shitfaced and bring her into bed when she's too tanked to say no.
Can you circle which buddies she can still get on the turps with?
At the back of the class a student scrawls into a desk;
Bottom to top, left to right, bottom to top
Left to right, top to bottom, left to right.
Sometimes a swastika says;
I'm bored.
Sometimes it says
Fuck you
Or
I hate everyone that doesn't look like me
Or
The extermination of you and everyone you love is entirely justified by my politics.
Can you tell which is which?
Please give this test your full attention.
Look,
left to right, track down to the bottom, and swing to the right.
bottom to top, left moves rightward, bottom to top.
both ways before crossing the road, in someone's eyes when you talk to them,
not into the eyes of an angry dog,
or a stranger at night,
for cyclists before opening the door,
And for fallen power-lines after a storm.
Left to right, up and down.
I spy a kitten, a bird on a pail,
Two pencils, a pizza, a fish and a snail.
Can you find the stormtrooper in the room of pandas?
Can you find the spider in the pile of coal?
Can you find the lowest prices on new and used cars?
Can you find the best legal advice, or someone to love, or someone who knows first aid, or somebody who really just gets me, or somebody who speaks your language, who can find the right legal solution, or Wally, or where in the world Carmen Sandiago is?
I spy a shell, a bell and a knight.
A marble, a truck, and a bird taking flight.
Left to right.
Up and down.
Uh-oh!
Safety Sam is visiting his friend Dave the Dangerous Dingo.
There are eight things in Dave's kitchen that are totally not safe.
Can you spot them all?
Left to right, up and down.
Sometimes it's difficult to tell the difference between things.
A mole and a melanoma.
A bad mood and a breakdown.
A hot date and a rapist.
Can you spot five differences between these two images?
Please click on potential hazards that could interrupt your driving. Give this test your full attention; one day your life may depend on this skill.
Uh oh!
James the Jihadi Jabaru has been talking with Safety Sam's fifteen friends.
He's been telling then that the end of aggressive Western Imperialism is only possible through violent resistance.
Can you find which of Sam's friends have been turned against him?
If you see something, say something.
Hairstyles, accents, clothing choices, stories that don't quite add up, all these can be clues.
Have you ever bought or rented a videotape that wasn't quite right?
Please report scams or illegal material by pressing the report button.
88 can mean Heil Hitler.
We suggest you check all characteristics that apply to your or your loved one's group, and print this page for future reference.
I'd like to pay by paypal, but will have a courier collect the car as I’m working on an oil rig.
The Tax Office will never ask you for your username and password.
Can you find the
Needle in the haystack?
Q in the Os?
Drunk driver on the highway?
Domestic abuser on the dating site?
Uh oh!
Safety Samantha's seven best boy buddies have been talking with Carl the Coercive Cockatoo. He recommends they get her shitfaced and bring her into bed when she's too tanked to say no.
Can you circle which buddies she can still get on the turps with?
At the back of the class a student scrawls into a desk;
Bottom to top, left to right, bottom to top
Left to right, top to bottom, left to right.
Sometimes a swastika says;
I'm bored.
Sometimes it says
Fuck you
Or
I hate everyone that doesn't look like me
Or
The extermination of you and everyone you love is entirely justified by my politics.
Can you tell which is which?
Please give this test your full attention.
BUY
...